RECIPES

Max's Special Christmas Cake

First ,sample the whiskey, to check for quality. Next take a large bowl and check the whiskey again. To be sure it's the highest quality pour one level cup and drink. Repeat. Turn on electric mixer, beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl. Add one teaspoon of sugar and beat again. Make sure the whiskey is still ok. Cry another tup. Tune up the mixer. Beat to leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit. Mix on the turner. If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaters, pry it goose with a drewscriver. Sample the whiskey to check for tonsisticity. Next, sift two cups of salt. Or something. Who cares? Check the whiskey. Now sift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one table. Spoon the sugar or something. Whatever you can find. Grease the oven. Turn the cake tin to 350 degrees. Don't forget to beat off the tuner. Throw the bowl out of the window. Check the whiskey again and go to bed.

1 Cup of Water

1 Cup of Sugar

4 Large brown eggs

2 Cups dried fruit

1 teaspoon salt

1 Cup brown sugar

Lemon Juice

Nuts

1 Bottleof Whiskey